The school holiday has officially started 2 days ago. And well i'm still as busy as ever, juggling with work and time. Doing hell lots of shopping besides having to work haha. Spend a bomb on accessories, bags, clothes and really random stuffs. Oh and i kind of get used to the ugly intercon uniform alrd. Khaki brown pants! Speaking of which, payday again tmrw can't waitttttt! Nevertheless, today's the only rightful break i'd before embarking on working for seagate at sitex from tmrw till sunday. Expo, shit i think i'll just die from shag-ness. Anyhow ytd's working hours almost got me killed, 16hours of work = child labour please! Well after this week, will be taking a break from work i guess. Need some time to get back to studying mode to prepare for J2's module (haha zomg i sounded like some siao mugger). Okay i don't think it's possible for me to settle down to studying (yet), we shall see how things go then. Speaking of which, need to start doing my CSE IS proposal draft 1 alrd, due 31st nov 12pm shit. Sucks to be me, slap myself for taking china studies itchy butt only. Oh and i'm letting it go, gently ( i guess). k till then bye i'm a boring girl now i've no pictures to share bb!

To begin with this is a really nice picture (imo), taken quite some time ago during a class chalet. Those were the times when i'm laughing, enjoying the companies i'd. Those were the times when i forgot about my troubles my pain my worries my sorrow. I don't know it's been some time since i felt genuinely happy and blessed. I hate myself for being so pessimistic about life yet those feelings are so hard to fight. I do wallow in self-pity at times. I looked back in life, snickered at how pathetic i am. I tried to look ahead tell myself that things might not be as horrible as how i visualized them to be. Nevertheless i was proved wrong, again and again.

At times when i need the my pillar of strength, i don't know who i can confide to. Sometimes i questioned myself, who are my true friends? Are they ever there for me or are they too caught up in their own world. Do they look for me just because they need me to send them photos, do they look for me just because i'm dumb enough to be a spare tyre, do they look for me just because they need my help in certain areas. Perhaps i'm just that insignificant to get involved.

No high expectations or whatsnot, but i've been waiting in vain.
I need to smile, really.

1. OP last friday. The intense atmosphere in the classroom is scaryyyy!
2. Wednesday, 45 minutes of GPF filing draws an end to Project Work. (Like finally)
3. Work school work school rest work school work school. Mundane not.
4. OGL interview. I think i'm full of shit but at least i gave my honest opinion.
5. Thursday. Judgement dayy II, school seems like a hell for the day.
6. Paycheck rolled in yesterday, $$$$$$$ = :>
7. Please tell me my hair is growing.
8. Breakdown point yesterday, it's all too much for me to shoulder.
9. Tired of trying, tired of believing, tired of opening up. Enough.
10. I'm fucking fat obese horizontally challenged. Low self-esteem.

( It's about time )

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After 8 months or so of hard work, blood and sweat, a fullstop was drawn for tortuous Project Work. Hopefully the results that are gnna release next April would be satisfying (attaining what i sow). Thursday - Judgement Day II, the release of promotional status. Many brought a heavy heart to school, some were relieved soon after whereas some sank even deeper after the verdict. Admin stuffs were settled before Mr Wahab release our results to us. Well my overall grades which comprises of Promos + MYE + CA (tests/assignments) = CCE-DE granted me my promotion to J2 next year. Some said i did quite well but i'm not exactly please with my results. Just thankful for it 'cos i know i am capable of producing better results if i mug hard enough. And to friends who are asked to retain, don't get too affected by it. I know it's really hard to concede defeat especially at this point of time but it could be a blessing in disguise. Take this extra mile, the extra year to brush up on weaker subjs/weaker topics. Retaining ain't the end of the world. Cheer up and the rest of us will be here for you guys :)



[update]
Chio steve maddens heels on sale for $70. Cheap + my size + pretty but i didn't get it in the end. Sigh wish i could be more decisive at times. Am still thinking about it but it's gone for good ):